Wednesday, 15 July 2015

A Cool Thing: Thresher

I had an idea for a blog post, but then I watched this short film called 'Thresher' and decided to post that here instead.

It's a 7-ish minute piece of Lovecraftian horror. For those who are weak-willed, there is one jump scare, but it's pretty tame and the piece is worth watching regardless.





I have my thoughts and theories at to what exactly is going on, but I'll save that for another post...

The director has done a whole bunch of other cool stuff, including some pretty Steamy music videos (I mean Steampunk, not sex). Go check them out!

Wednesday, 8 July 2015

Backing Up

I have more fun with these titles than I should...


My laptop is on its last legs. Its last laptop-y legs. Laptops have legs. Leggy leggy laptops. The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog.

I have everything on here. Maiden Voyage, Lifebringer, Ambervale, sequels, prequels, plans. Everything. Every resource relating to my writing is on this laptop. Plus all my scriptwork for school is here too.

It's also on a backup drive.

I own a PC now, which I finally have internet connectivity on. That means it too is connected to the aforementioned backup drive. When the laptop dies, Lifebringer will live on (ha ha).

And suddenly I realise how badly organised my files are. Well actually no, they're not too bad. They're better than most, I'd even wager. Everything I use is well-indexed. The organisation is clear, categorical and concise. Documents get labeled properly and folders are neatly arranged.

And then there's everything I don't use.

I haven't updated iTunes in a year, because my music is so disorganised that iTunes can't find everything automatically, and for some reason iTunes can't fucking update itself without WIPING MY ENTIRE MUSIC LIBRARY FIRST. I'm tired of having to manually add all my music into iTunes because I have things in all different places. There's files from CDs that went on to the back up drive before digital downloads were around. There's things I bought on iTunes. There's things I imported to iTunes. There's EPs I've downloaded from bandcamp. There's free singles I've got off Soundcloud. There's so much music, and it all ends up in different places.

It's my fault, really. I don't take the time to codify things like that, because I can just download them, open them direct from Chrome and throw them in iTunes. I don't ever have to walk down that file path again, so why should I bother making it all neat and tidy?

I should do it because every time I update iTunes, I lose music.

Then there's all the other stuff I lose when things update.

I'm migrating my things to a new PC, and it's not a 'clean' PC as it were (the previous owner still has game files and so forth on it). This time, I want to do it right, and it's incredibly hard. But it will pay off. Or so I've been told.

At least I have a backup of everything.

Sunday, 5 July 2015

The Unemployment Line

A few days ago I went to the place I used to work. A lot of the old-timers were still there. A lot more had left. It was a strange thing to experience.

Then at 2 PM my girlfriend received rejection notices from two different jobs. That was rough, especially after we'd spent the morning talking about my passing nostalgia for my previous job. When someone talks about a good job they had, then you get turned down for what looked like promising jobs, it takes a toll on you.

Then at 2:30 PM she got a call from an employer regarding a job she had been very enthusiastic about. She had the job, and was starting the next week.

The tables had been turned.

I was happy for her. Hell, I was ecstatic. Almost as much as she was.

But still, I'm unemployed.

And I'm not happy.

And I'm going into an industry where your job status is tied to how many times you throw yourself at the wall.

This is getting tough.

Wednesday, 1 July 2015

The Ongoing Previews

I won't post too much of Lifebringer, especially since it's still rough as hell due to a lack of editing. Still, I'm excited about it, and I want you to be excited about it too.

So here's chapter 4. The previous 3 can be found in the 'Lifebringer' tab here and there.

Just a warning, it's another short one.


Chapter 4
Planned Luck

     Wrin stood stunned, but only for a moment. It had worked, exactly as it should have. At the end of his luck and the beginning of his courage, his masterful plan had worked.
     He stood no longer. Hurrying out of the room, Wrin strode toward the table to check the abandoned ledger left by the first speaker. His guess was it would have some record of who was admitted and who wasn't. But his guess proved wrong as he found it full of administrative details. There were columns of names, names, names. Mothers' names, fathers' names. His name at the bottom. There was nothing else to imply a granting of admission to the Academy.
     Wrin left the table then, heading out the room's second door in the direction of the second chapel. The newly admitted Priests would gather there to say a brief prayer while their families watched from above. This was the plan's biggest danger. For the full 30 seconds of his feigned prayer he would be exposed. If any of the four Priests from the admissions room came to look for him, he'd be caught and the jig would be up. But he had planned for more damage than they could handle in 30 seconds.
     There was a ledger inside the entrance to the chapel. Wrin checked this and saw a list of names all in the same handwriting. Maybe it was intentional, to stop forgery. Or maybe it was just tradition that one man wrote in the ledger. Either way, it wasn't enough to stop Wrin. With no hesitation and showing no signs of cautious penmanship, Wrin wrote his own name in a perfect imitation of the ones above. Wrin smiled to himself. Beside each name was a number, counting upward to eleven. Wrin added the number '12' beside his name.
     Taking a seat shortly after that, Wrin bowed his head and began to count, distorting the shape of his mouth as he did in case anyone turned his way. It would be a stupid thing to be caught for, counting when he should have been praying. The seconds crawled by, and Wrin fought to keep his pace steady as the numbers grew bigger.
     '28, 29, 30'
     Then he rose and strode out the archway opposite to the one he had come through. Here, he assumed, most new students went off instructions they were given as to where dorms were and where they needed to report to. Many would in fact loop around and meet family out front to receive their packed belongings and exchange final hugs. Wrin had nothing to take with him, so he took the direct route. He'd had something the other students hadn't: the Cathedral's blueprints.
     'Where would Khol be now?' he wondered. The thought was matter-of-fact, lacking all remorse.
     He'd still be by the Paladin's quarters, Wrin guessed. Or maybe already wrangled in the arms of a half-dozen Priests. He would have been standing in the hallway, against the wall that separated him from the Paladins, and over the floor that concealed something none of them were meant to know about. He would have placed the charge, counted the seconds, set it, primed it, and run. By the time it went off he would have slipped through a dozen passageways and pipelines, taking the routes the greasemen had opened up. In the end he would have come out behind the fleeing Paladins, right where Wrin should have been standing...
     The dormitory building loomed before Wrin, just off to the side of the outdoor walkway he was walking along. To his left was a well-groomed field of pruned flowers and trimmed grass. It was glorious. He could get used to living here.
     He reached the dorm building, a large grey mass of stone in the same style as the Cathedral. The only difference was the shape. Where the Cathedral was shaped like an even-armed cross with its top all spired and buttressed, the dorms were a long, three-storey rectangle. The adornment was minimal, but still present in a few places. On the front wall was a large window of stained glass. While those inside the Cathedral depicted the great Priests and Paladins of the world, this one was simply the red form of the Protector's cross suspended in a disc of milky white.
     The Academy grounds were enormous, he realised. Sure, he'd seen the blueprints and maps, memorising the layout of buildings sprawled behind the Cathedral. But as with most things it was something else entirely to see it with his own eyes. Those two-dimensional boxes with all their careful lines were real, tangible objects out here. It was awe-inspiring, seeing those diagrams realised. Out behind the dorms would be the lecture halls, and beside that was the Medicum. A long corridor linked that back to the library, and then onward to the Clericum that stood streetside beside the Cathedral. In between them all were massive greens, all adorned with flowers. Way out to the western edge, somewhere on Wrin's left, was the Apothecarium. Why they would need something as crude as herbal remedies in a place like this was beyond him, but nonetheless it constituted the largest apothecarial garden in the Five Nations.
     The dormitory was upon Wrin now, and he was pleased to find the great oaken doors were wide open. Once inside his eyes took a moment to adjust from being in the sunlight, but he already knew this floor anyway. He was in the mess hall, and backing on to that was the study hall and commons. He strode across the mess hall, passing by the kitchens on his left and a series of long tables that could sit 24 men each on his right. Passing through another open door, he emerged into the common room.
     He stopped for a moment, taking in the lavish comforts of the room. There were two long tables for study, not unlike those in the mess hall. They were behind a partition that seemed all too thin to damped the noise from the commons. The common space itself was adorned with couches and chairs of bright red velvet, framed by a fine, varnished white wood. The colours of the Protector. All around there was enough to seat maybe 30 people in each area, far less than what the mess hall could accommodate.
     At the far end of the common room was a staircase. Up these stairs would be the dormitory floor, and above that was a series of private rooms for studying when one needed isolation. Wrin had seen that floor on the blueprints, had seen 30 spaces all surrounded by paper-thin walls. What people needed to study in that room was a mystery to him. But then, that's why he'd come here, to learn things like what that room was for.
     Wrin climbed the stairs and exited them on the dorm floor. There were beds, again about 30. A heavy-looking trunk lay at the foot of each bed, and simple wooden desk sat beside them. On each desk was a lamp, but they looked nothing like the tickers Wrin was used to.
     "Afternoon." came a voice from beside him, startling Wrin. He suppressed a frightened jump. He was better than that sort of thing.
     "And yourself." said Wrin all cordial, turning to face the voice.
     It belonged to a boy who looked about the same age as him. His hair was a sandy blonde and his face was clean shaven.
     "Lorsem, but call me Lor." he said, extending a hand.
     "Wrin, short for Wrinlett." Wrin replied, taking the hand in a firm shake, "I wasn't expecting anyone else to be here."
     "Neither," said Lor, "but then I'm always willing to make a friend."
     'This fucks up everything...' thought Wrin. No-one was meant to see him just yet. All the other students were supposed to be off fetching belongings so they could move in.
     "You've moved in already?" Wrin asked.
     "Wasn't much to move, all told. Looks like you're about the same." said Lor with a dripping smile.
     This was it, the one tiny thing that could unravel all his plans. Here Wrin could no longer play the game, now he had to play the man. He was good at it normally, but this time the stakes were higher. This time he actually wanted something.
     "Listen, Lor," Wrin began. There was something crucial Lor had said, a broadcast of weakness. Friend. "I need to go clean myself up." Wrin motioned to his beard and scruffy hair. "Don't tell anyone you saw me like this, yeah? You'd do that for a friend?"
     Wrin's eyes were soft as they'd go, practically begging for sympathy. Inside, Wrin smiled as he watched Lor's face light up.
     "Sure thing! I know how it can be, looking all odds and ends!" he proclaimed with a grin.
     Wrin replied with a smile that creased the corners of his eyes. He'd long since learned that creasing the eyes made you look kind and honest.
     "Thanks." he said, keeping his smile as he turned and left the dorm.
     As he headed for the washroom his smile changed. Normally he wouldn't risk giving himself away, but here alone on the landing he indulged himself. His eyes uncreased, his cheeks rose and his smile pulled inwards on his jowls. Crosses Lor was easy.
     At the top of the landing, right by the stairs, was the door to a washroom. It was in here that Wrin procured the only belongings he'd taken with him: a straight-edge razor and a small pair of scissors. Standing over one of the sinks in the row of washbasins, he looked into the reflective glass and brought the razor to his cheek. For a moment he mimed the motion of shaving, making sure his hands would stay steady. Then he filled the basin with water, splashed it on his face a few times and began to cut away his great bushy beard.
     When he left the bathroom his face was clean and his hair was short and neatly trimmed.
     "Crosses! You look like a whole new man!" exclaimed Lor as Wrin came through the door.
     "Yes, and no-one can know what I used to look like." Wrin said again, voice stern but not chiding.
     Lor mimed a zipping motion across his lips, and Wrin turned from him and headed down the room. He made for a bed down the far end, on the inside of the stained glass window. Kicking off his beaten up shoes, he lay on the bed and started at the ceiling. In truth, he had nothing to do until the commotion over in the Cathedral was sorted, and he had no choice but to hope he didn't end up implicated in the whole affair. Maybe he should go back and talk with Lor for a while, he had nothing else to do now that he'd claimed a bed.
     Just as he was thinking it, Lor piped up.
     "So what brings you here?" said Lor, already on his feet and wandering over to Wrin.
     There was a good chance Lor could become a nuisance, but he was at least earnest and friendly, Wrin decided.
     "Same reason as anyone I guess." Wrin replied, turning to face Lor so as to not seem dismissive. Lor nodded his head, taking a seat on the bed opposite Wrin.
     "I had an uncle become a Priest, and he'd always been my grandfather's favourite because of it." said Lor. Wrin didn't make any expression of disgust, but Lor continued with, "It's mean to say, but it's true."
     Wrin raised his eyebrows, as if to say 'fair enough'. He didn't make a response though, so Lor continued. "My dad resented me for my gifts, I think. He kicked me out when I told him, and it's taken me two years to get here and enrol."
     As he spoke, his eyes looked away and his head bowed a little. It was slight, but Wrin knew how to read a man like a book. Lor was hurt, deeply.
     "That's terrible." said Wrin.
     And it was. That didn't mean Wrin felt bad for Lor, mind. If he knew the first thing about what Wrin had been through he'd probably cry. All the same, Lor's tale was unfortunate.
     "But really, what about you? Why act on the gift and learn to be a Priest? Protector knows we all had a choice when he chose us." asked Lor, all the sadness gone from his voice as though it had never been there.
     Wrin paused for a bit, meeting Lor's eyes at first, then looking away.
     "I don't know, I guess I've just always wanted to be one." said Wrin.

     And it was the first honest thing he'd said all day.

Sunday, 28 June 2015

A Review: Leviathan

Alright, another review.

This is one I picked up a fair while ago. Whitcoulls had overstocked themselves with this book, and were literally stacking it on the stairwells with $5 price stickers. I bought it, I read it, I regretted it. I didn't finish the sequel.

Scott Westerfeld, the book's author, was already well-known for his 'Uglies' trilogy (and the 'Specials' standalone). I enjoyed his work immensly there, and figured I'd enjoy this series just as much, if not a little moreso due to its notoriously Steampunk-y world. He's a good, reputable author, there's no denying that.

Leviathan follows Alek, prince to an empire about to be thrown into war with his father's assassination, and Deryn, a young girl desperate to join the British Air Service even though only men are allowed. So of course, Deryn pretends to be a boy.

For a male author, Westerfeld seems to have little to no knowledge of how boys act. Sure, that might be the point, given that Deryn doesn't really know how boys act either, but if her act is bad then wouldn't she be found out right away? So yes, the book started with plausibility going down the toilet for me. And holy hell was she annoying. There's nothing worse than an annoying protagonist. I don't like her motivations, I don't like her actions and I don't like her internal dialogue.

Alek, on the other hand, ruins everything. His parents are killed and he is escorted away by very capable men with a very sophisticated contingency plan, which Alek consistently ruins. Sure, his 'ruining' the plan saves everyone on Deryn's air-whale-ship-bullshit in the end but in truth the whole thing just didn't fly for me. Yes, story endings are often on the 'convenient' side, and the protagonist doing things wrong will often be proven right in the long run, but at the end of the day I simply can't get behind Alek's actions. Even if the thing he does at the end is good, up until that point all he's really done is potentially jeopardised his safety. In fact, he does exactly that at the end too, only he gets away with it so we're meant to sit there and accept that it was the right thing to do.

Criticisms of character aside, the premise of the world is an interesting one. The Allies (pre-WWI), called 'Darwinists', use genetically engineered creatures as their 'military machines' while the other side of things (Clankers) use actual machines (namely giant walkers). Westerfeld does a good job of building lots of detail into the world, giving the reader a good sense of depth to things. It's immersive, and (somewhat) plausible, so on this front the book does fairly well. I still didn't like it, but that's on me this time.

I dunno, I just find the idea of salamanders crawling through a system of tubes built inside a flying whale kinda gross. Oh and the stuff about metal deckplates on the whale's innards is gross too.

Actually the entire execution of the 'Darwinist' creatures is really really off-putting if you put a moment's thought into it...

Normally books get away with that by being so gripping that you don't get a moment to think about it, or so good that you don't care about things like that. But Scott, the characters were terrible and vastly unlikeable, what did you expect me to focus on?

The ending is 100% what you'd expect, if you assume everyone thinks like a selfless but naiive 12-year-old. It's okay.

Oh and why the hell does Deryn act like she's fucking 10? She's a 15-year-old, pretending to be a 16-year-old.

Also, no book should include the phrase 'bum-rag full of clart'.


I said in my first ever review that I wouldn't give a numerical rating. I'm sticking to that principle You might like this book, but I didn't, and I got through 'Finnegan's Wake' dammit!

Wednesday, 24 June 2015

Another!

This may contain spoilers...

Or it may not...

Never trust someone over the internet...

I think Lifebringer should become a series. Granted, I'm getting a little ahead of myself here, but I really do think Lifebringer should be one of a series of books. I've been thinking about this for a while now actually, and I have a few ideas about how I'd extend this into a series.

Option A is to have further stories following Wrinlett. The upshot is it makes the series more cohesive, and it would have an indeterminate length as the series would essentially be 'how many stories of Wrin are there to tell?'

Option B is what I'm leaning more toward, which would have 6 books, each concerning a practicer of one of the world's 6 kinds of magic. The issue is this series could feel less cohesive, as essentially the only similarities between books would be the world itself. I might not even want to set pieces in the same time period as one another. Also, after a while I feel it would become a little formulaic. If the intention is to have 6 books, each following someone who does something significant, the reader is going to know that the character will do something significant. This, I feel, would make it difficult to have twists and turns, and may make otherwise good stories a little boring purely because the reader (loosely) knows how it's going to end. Granted, that's all a challenge I need to overcome. The issue is I'm not sure I can overcome it. At least not for 6 books.

I could trim Option B down to less than 6 books, but that seems a little pointless really. That would leave an incomplete set in my opinion. It's like if the Harry Potter series skipped out every other year. Or like writing a songs about Earth, Air and Fire while missing out water. The series would naturally fall as being 6 books under this structure.

So how do I tackle this problem? How do I make 6 whole stories that are interesting, exciting, engaging and let's be honest, readable when the premise gives massive hints at any given ending? You'd pick up a book, get introduced to a character, and sit there knowing that by the end they would have done something significant. I can't fake out and have them not do something significant or I debase the premise of the series. I can't stick to the formula because that makes something boring.

Ah well, I'll come up with something...

Sunday, 21 June 2015

A Week Well Wasted

I feel again like I've done a whole lot of nothing.

Only I haven't.

Ok, sure, I haven't done heaps, but this week I've got a lot more done than I have in recent months. I've been sick as a dog all week, yet I still managed to get my shit together for a shoot on Thursday (which came out real nice) and managed to get the ball rolling on Lifebringer again (which now stands at 50,000 words). It's not been a lot, but it's been progress.

It's really hard to remember in the harder times how much work I have done in the past. I can sit there feeling what what I've written is crap, but I have to remind  myself that a) it's only a draft and b) I'm still learning to write books. It's so easy to forget those things and get myself down. It's easy to make no progress and beat myself up over it. It's easy to fall into a slump and not have the patience or energy to get out of it.

I've been in a slump, and I'm hoping that this last week means I'm on my way out of it.

Thing is, for the longest time I was getting frustrated that I wasn't doing any work on Lifebringer, or any other of my projects for that matter. In truth, it's okay to not get anything done if I'm not able to get myself working. I could force myself to write 500 words, hate the process, hate the words and frustrate myself with having to edit them later. Or I could just wait. I could wait until I can write 2,000 words, and have them be better than if I'd forced them.

Now yes, this says some things about work ethic. But I'm not saying 'it's ok to slack off and not try', I'm just saying it's ok to stop if trying hard is yielding nothing. I'm not working to a deadline here. I'm not under any contracts. I've got other stuff in my life and I'm allowed to let my writing sit idle for a time if I so please. What I'm not allowed to do, at least if I want to be taking myself seriously, is stop trying. It's important to keep myself 'in practice', if you will. And that means sitting the fuck down and trying to get some work done from time to time. Or writing a short one-off piece just to keep my skills sharp

So that's what I've done this week. I've been legitimately slacking off, and I'm done getting down on myself about it. So now I'm making myself try and write, even if I end up deleting all the words after an hour. It's paid off this week in the form of another chapter of Lifebringer, and my hope is that before long it'll yield greater and greater returns.

And if it doesn't, then at least I can be satisfied that I'm trying. The alternative sucks.